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Post by CoffeeCrisp on Mar 13, 2007 9:49:19 GMT -5
TOO EASY.
By holding that fluffy beast hostage (literally HOLDING the panda), you can be sure that your zapper won't dare shock you, for fear of damaging an endangered beast's constitution. Alternatively, a little shock therapy might just cure the panda's inability to mate in captivity. RUN NUKLEARLAD, RUN!
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 13, 2007 10:51:54 GMT -5
I have a problem: Our sun will one day expand enough to suck in our planet and end our world in a hellish firestorm of death.
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Post by CoffeeCrisp on Mar 13, 2007 13:16:42 GMT -5
I have a solution: Buy stocks in watermelon farming
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 13, 2007 21:48:25 GMT -5
I have a solution: Stockpile your watermelon farming stocks until the market bottoms out. Once you've destroyed the stock market allow a few years for the world's nation's economies to fail completely and then allow anarchy to set in.
In the mean time, make sure you start using your control of the watermelon market to stockpile actual watermelons.
Ok, now that you have a massive stockpile of fruit, preferably properly preserved, sway the anarchy population by bribing them with watermelon. Now that you've united the starving people of earth under your rule you can begin the true plan.
Have them construct the following: 1)Space-faring engines of superior speed 2)Terra-forming technology 3)Long-term life support systems
Now go and terraform and colonize countless worlds outside our solar system so that one little supernova can never destroy our entire civilization.
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Post by zemalia on Mar 15, 2007 10:13:27 GMT -5
I have a problem: I need sleep
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Post by pleadingvirtue on Mar 15, 2007 10:56:31 GMT -5
I have a solution: Play the Sims. <3
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 15, 2007 11:44:23 GMT -5
I have a solution : The Sims puts me to sleep. Ridiculous faux life. Now SPORE, that's exciting
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Post by moroiiangel on Mar 15, 2007 13:09:13 GMT -5
I have a problem: People do not have open minds.
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Post by zemalia on Mar 15, 2007 14:54:02 GMT -5
I have a solution: Send pretzels to the president.
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Post by rabidusfossor on Mar 15, 2007 15:26:40 GMT -5
Now, we all know these pretzels are comically misshapen and everyone will get a kick out of the fact that they are misshapen therefore no one will think twice about eating them. What they don't know can't kill them...unless what I do know is that I laced those pretzels with LSD an cocaine. The president will then trip out along with everyone else and have wild sex parties where in they become more open minded because they are sharing everything everyone. The RHCP, David Suzuki and Opera will show up too. In the end The United States will be renamed and it's major export will me lingerie.
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 15, 2007 22:53:20 GMT -5
I have a problem: I'm bleeding out of my eyes
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Post by pleadingvirtue on Mar 16, 2007 10:10:26 GMT -5
I have a solution: Make sword-chucks. (They were staring at me.) <3 PS: No killing hobos for replacement parts this time. It's been done.
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Post by zemalia on Mar 19, 2007 12:21:28 GMT -5
I have an explantion: Swing the sword chucks as fast as you possibly can, meaning you will probably end up hurting yourself since you don't know how to use them very well. By doing this, you will probably have cut yourself up pretty good, meaning you'll be bleeding from other parts of your body. In a couple of hours you'll run out of blood and therefore stop bleeding from your eyes. In retrospect, you will be dead though..
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Post by rabidusfossor on Mar 20, 2007 11:39:01 GMT -5
I have a problem: One word, mice. They are too cute to kill and a huge problem back home.
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 20, 2007 12:54:37 GMT -5
I have a solution: Tame and Train an army of Zombie Warriors
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Post by zemalia on Mar 20, 2007 13:08:05 GMT -5
I have an explantion: By training these Zombies they will now do you bidding, but for a price. Since you clearly don't want them feasting off the brains of your good friends, send them to the mice. They might have small brains, but they'll still make a tasty snack. And now you won't have to worry about the mice dying, because they'll just become Zombie mice. It will rock. And then you can start the Zombocilpyse.
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Post by pleadingvirtue on Mar 22, 2007 1:33:47 GMT -5
I have a problem: My spelling and grammar must be completely perfect in order for me to function properly as a human, but I'm so tired that I'm making typos. <3
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Post by CoffeeCrisp on Mar 22, 2007 8:03:27 GMT -5
I have a solution: marry a charcoal briquette.
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Nuklearlad
Black Mail Artist
I'm deep, in a "what the heck is he thinking?" kind of way
Posts: 141
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Post by Nuklearlad on Mar 24, 2007 15:08:21 GMT -5
By way of this marriage you can pass yourself off as a charchoal statue of a woman, instead of a woman, and therefore set your standards lower
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Post by CoffeeCrisp on Mar 25, 2007 8:02:54 GMT -5
I have a problem: the government wants my bone marrow.
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